Archive for November, 2007


Randy Danes on the Train…

Today, a steamy story of lust, desire, passion… and freezing cold at a Danish train station:

Freezing passengers had called the DSB rail company to complain that they were stuck out in the cold due to the steamy love-making of a 37-year-old man and a 30-year-old woman.

Police were called in and finally put an end to the spectacle, lecturing the couple to “go back to their bed, away from prying eyes,” Andersen said.

“I guess they weren’t real Vikings (because) they remained dressed. That’s why we didn’t charge them with indecency,” he added. – [Yahoo/AFP]

OK, I have to admit, this made me laugh. Firstly because, if I were sitting in a train station and it was freezing outside, I would not leave the warmth of my station seat just because a couple decided to get it on in the train station. Much less call the cops on the cute couple. But I’m good like that.

But the other thing is, they were still fully clothed! I mean come on! If they had actually stripped down to their birthday suits in the middle of the station, then I might have understood everyones reaction. It would certainly have elicited, at the very least, a raised eyebrow from yours truly. But no. These folks were probably still bundled in their winter gear when the “look of love” struck them. And sent every other patron of the station packing.

Typical of the curmudgeon majority to voluntarily go stand out in the cold and then call the police on people minding their own “business”… Wusses… 😛

Frisky couple leave Danish train passengers out in cold – [Yahoo/AFP]


British tube officials have no sense of humor…

OK, I know the brits are known for thier “stiff upper lip” and all that, but come on, not even a little holiday humor? Apparently a British tube announcer decided to record a few humorous holiday public service announcements. Which, unfortunately, cost her big time:

The messages include:

* “We would like to remind our American tourist friends that you are almost certainly talking too loudly.”

* “Would the passenger in the red shirt pretending to read the paper but who is actually staring at that woman’s chest please stop. You are not fooling anyone, you filthy pervert.”

* “Would passengers filling in answers on their Sudokus please accept that they are just crosswords for the unimaginative and are not in any way more impressive just because they contain numbers.”

* “Here we are crammed again into a sweaty Tube carriage … If you’re female smile at the bloke next to you and make his day. He’s probably not had sex for months.”

Clarke said it was “just a bit of a laugh.” But Tube operator Transport for London (TfL) failed to see the funny side and dropped her, after eight years. – [AP/Reuters]

OK, how seriously uptight do you have to be to not find these humorous. At the very least worth a grin. And after 8 years of service, you’d figure she at least deserved at most a slap on the wrist, as opposed to termination.

If I were a Brit, I’d be organizing a protest, boycotting the tube, something. That lady needs to get her job back. Darn British Tube operators have no sense of humor…

Announcer sacked over spoof messages – [AP/Reuters]


Baby takes over thanksgiving…

Today we have a story about a thanksgiving miracle:

An impatient baby ruined Thanksgiving dinner for a family which then welcomed its newest member on the road to the hospital. Minyon Brister said her contractions started Thursday as she bent down to put the turkey in the oven.

“The pain just started,” she said. “And I knew it was time.”

Before she could get to Natchez Regional Hospital from her Woodville home, however, Mykayla Jalyin Gaines arrived in the back seat of her stepfather’s truck. – [Yahoo/AP]

Well, you certainly can’t accuse this kid if not having impeccable timing. I’ll bet she thought it would be funny too. And then on top of that, shes gonna get birthday presents on Thankgiving. Talk about giving thanks.

Only one thing bothers me about this article. Did they have to say she “ruined” Thanksgiving dinner?!? The baby wanted to help with the turkey. Was that so wrong?

Woman has baby in truck on Thanksgiving – [Yahoo/AP]


A car thief with a conscience… Or a good head on his shoulders…

Yet another tale of soft hearted thievery:

 A thief in Germany got the guilties and returned the car he had stolen after finding an 18-month old baby on the back seat, police said Friday. – [Yahoo/AFP]

Now if you’re just a small time car thief, I’m sure this would make for a very bad day. Especially if you’re the kind hearted sort. You really wouldn’t want to get stuck having to raise some careless ninny’s kids on account of your stealing their car. Seriously. Now you’d have two mouths to feed, school, bullies, medical and dental expenses to think of. And that’s all before college.

He was wise to return the vehicle. Babies are more trouble than they’re worth. But I found one thing just a wee bit odd. Nobody seemed to be miffed that the little tyke was left in the car, all alone, with the keys in the ignition…

Teething problems for German car thief with a conscience – [Yahoo/AFP]


Purse snatching at it’s worst.

You know, purse snatching is one thing, but fingers?!?:

Pinkins drove by a 55-year-old woman at about 2 p.m. on Wednesday, swiped her purse and stepped on the gas, Gwinnett Police Corporal Illana Spellman said.

“As the suspect drove away, one of the victim’s fingers was pulled off,” Spellman said. – [Yahoo/AP]

Now seriously, I can see why somone might decide to snatch some old ladies purse. Not that I agree with it, mind you, but I can understand a ne’er-do-wells motivation for doing so. But taking her finger? That’s just wrong. I’m not OK with that. It’s not like he could do anything with it. Seriously.

If an old/older lady gives you that much resistance when you try to grab that purse, please, people, in the name of all that is decent, just let it go. Osteoporosis is a serious problem nowadays. Some of these older ladies limbs ain’t as strong as they used to be. Next time you might have to take her whole hand. Or even an arm. Who knows where it’ll end.

I guarantee you, trying to flee with an old ladies arm in tow ain’t cute. Just trust me on this.

Woman’s finger torn off during robbery – [Yahoo/AP]



In the event that you happen to celebrate thanksgiving today, I would like to extend my best wishes this thanksgiving day to all of you. I shall be enjoying an open spit roasted hog this evening, as the turkeys requested a reprieve, and are in short supply here in the forest due to a recent fire. (I was forced to prematurely consume a large number of them, and the population is still recovering. And no, I had nothing to do with the fire. Geez. Why does everyone keep asking me that. Yeah I’m a pyro, but still…)

However, I do hope the rest of you enjoy your turkey, ham, or what-have-you this Thanksgiving!!

– Phyreblade.


Shotgun or Tire Iron…?

Under normal circumstances, if you were to ask me this question, I might automatically say “Shotgun” without hesitation. However, I would be employing computer game thinking. In most computer games, the shottie pwns, and the tire iron is a weapon of last resort.

In real life, however, things aren’t so simple. I ran across an interesting article that illustrates the truth in the old adage “Bigger isn’t always better”. And as this guy found out, you are always better off choosing the right tool for the job:

A man trying to loosen a stubborn lug nut blasted the wheel with a 12-gauge shotgun, injuring himself badly in both legs, sheriff’s deputies said. – [Yahoo/AP]

Now this one has me stumped. I’m sure McGyver could have figured out a way to get that lug nut off using a shotgun, but I’m pretty certain that firing it at the tire, without protection, at point blank range, wouldn’t have been part of the process.

I bet that right now, he’s wishing he had just got someone to get him some WD40…

Best to use tools when loosening lug nut – [Yahoo/AP]

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November 2007
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