This pooch is screwed…

Another story from the “What The…” Department:

 A pampered pooch who inherited 12 million dollars from a late US hotel magnate earlier this year has fled to Florida under an assumed name after receiving death threats, a report said Monday.

Trouble, a white Maltese who belonged to billionaire Leona Helmsley until her death in August, was flown by private jet under tight security two months ago after receiving around 20 such threats, the New York Post reported.- [Yahoo/AFP]

LOL… Wut? Do people actually take things like this seriously? Would you actually mail in a death threat on a dog? And is there a dog protection program? I’m having a little difficulty wrapping my head around this one.

He added that the cost of Trouble’s round-the-clock security detail, medical care, chef-cooked meals and grooming were an estimated 300,000 dollars a year. The dog was previously living at a 28-room estate in Connecticut.

 When Trouble dies, any remaining money from her trust will go to the charitable foundations that inherited the lion’s share of Helmsley’s estimated four-billion-dollar estate. – [Yahoo/AFP]

OK I see. Yes, I understand now. And apparently the little bitch liked to bite people. That pooch needs to get taken out. Seriously. The morons who mailed in the death threat need to be shot. If you’re gonna kill a pooch, you just kill it. You don’t mail in and tell everyone you’re gonna do it. How stupid can you be? This is just another example of half hearted effort on the part of a wannabe canine assassin.

OK now, I know you folks out in Florida know where this little white Maltese is hiding out. Seriously, if you see a little white Maltese pooch you don’t recognize, living in a big estate, with an entourage and security detail, or being chauffeured around in a limo, that’s your pooch. Do us all a favor and whack the rich little white Maltese bitch. The charities will thank you…

Millionaire dog flees death threats: report – [Yahoo/AFP]


4 Responses to “This pooch is screwed…”

  1. 1 sexualtrex
    December 13, 2007 at 5:56 pm

    I don’t understand charity. It doesn’t ever help anyone. Why not give them money directly to someone who needs it. And try to keep from giving your millions to a dog.

  2. December 13, 2007 at 8:35 pm

    That’s not necessarily true. There are many community outreaches, and homes and stuff that are funded entirely, and directly, by charities. It’s all a matter of picking the right ones.
    Not to mention that a charity is a good way of helping as many people as possible. It is very hard to have that kind of impact on a mano-a-mano basis…

  3. December 14, 2007 at 4:51 pm

    Oh man. This gives me such great ideas for a blog. I wrote Trouble a few letters. Maybe I’ll post them so people can see how messed up I am. I feel bad about it now, but whatever. I don’t know where Trouble is anymore, so I guess he’s safe from me.

  4. December 15, 2007 at 12:16 am

    Ya know, I got peeps out in FL…. I could probably find her for ya if ya wanted to… Ya know… It’d be for a good cause… 😉

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